Monday, September 10, 2012

In which I begin my chic and refined living


So, to
This is written on my ancient washing machine.  The "urban" is a bit of a low blow.

(Slim my Cafemug)
and heavy my heart as I trudge through the days as I shall now relate...

I knew it.  IknewitIknewitIknewit.  You go and name a blog something like “A Catalogue of Light” and there is no way, no way, that it is not going to turn into a bitter joke.  No way in hell.  So, as promised, I am trying REALLY HARD not to transition directly into "A Catalogue of Woes" (English spelling retained for added pathos), but it's been tough.  Heretofore undiscovered, truly unpleasant, you-really-don't want-to-know levels of tough.  Hence my lack of posts.  Really, though; would you rather have nothing, or twenty pages of existential angst and philosophical maundering about fish?  You tell me.  'Cause I've got reserves.

Cultural Incident: this morning there was a man outside my bedroom window at six in the morning, mowing hay with some infernal hand-held machine, sort of like a giant circular saw weedeater with a backpack engine.  He was then raking the hay into rows.  With a rake.  A rake made of wood.  He appears to be about 80 years old.  End cultural incident.  

 
This is Bizarro-cat.  His name is Daifuku, which means “big luck.”  He is a sweet, friendly cat, but he will NOT. SHUT. UP.  All day, all night, maow maow maow mRRa’prauw lick maow bite lick lick cuddle paw MAAAAAUW.  Is it morally justifiable for a vegetarian to gag a cat?  Even if said cat is damaging her calm?  I’ve also never had an indoor/outdoor cat before, and his presence leaves me feeling distinctly unclean.  Which echoes my feelings for my apartment.  

The hell of wood paneling.  The entire downstairs (entry, washing machine, kitchen, bath, toilet) is covered in the most unconvincing metal trompe l'nul woodgrain I have ever seen.  On the mirror, upper left, is a drawing of a baby holding a shotgun.  Caption: "I believe my justice."

Entryway.  Thrill.
Office/living room with closets, bookshelf, and scuzzy couch suffering from pleather eczema.
Other side of the same room.  I actually love the floor-chair.
Bedroom.  This is where the laundry lives.  With a tiny washer, small wardrobe, and frequent rain, this indoor line is full 100% of the time, adding some much-needed humidity to my interior-scape.  Apparently, no sheets are currently made in Japan to fit this mattress, which is reasonable because it is crap.
But I have a tanuki!  So far he has failed to crush any of my foes with his giant swinging testicles, but I live in hope.
Exterior shot; more soon.  The grass out here is now above my knees.  Those of you with schoolboard experience can probably imagine the joy of having the country board of education as your landlord.

So, here it is, in all its glory.  Narrow, metal, old, hot.  The upstairs is not bad, just a little ragged (plus one room has these creepy gray baby hand-prints on the wall).  It has been a long time since I slept in the full summer heat without air conditioning; it’s actually been strangely nostalgic.  The discomfort of the whisper-thin, spring-sprung mattress, though, is neither nostalgic nor charming.  The reason I can’t sleep in the one air-conditioned room is difficult to explain without attaching a soundfile, but I’ll give it a go.  All the walls in my apartment have round vents with screens on the inside and heavy metal shutters on the outside.  These seem to regulate pressure somehow, gently flapping open from time to time and doing so more frequently and forcefully when the weather is changing.  The one in the air-conditioned living room, however, SLAMS at irregular intervals and incredible volume.  It shakes the walls and I can’t sleep through it.  

In lighter news, either I’ve finally stopped smelling like a racehorse with a glandular disorder, or I am losing the ability to perceive my own stench.  Really hoping it’s the former.  I have a beauty routine now that takes over an hour in the morning; hair, pretty clothes I hope, full make-up, tan pantyhose in the tropical heat...it's depressing.   

I can't confirm that it makes my make-up completely, but it is a really good eyelash curler.
Have I mentioned that Japan is the US in the 50's?  See upcoming posts for more details.  Suffice it to say that I am now putting more effort than ever before into my appearance, doing it while sick and from a home that makes me feel slimy.  I've had cockroaches, slugs, live lizards, dead lizards, dead mice, really dead mice, and lines of ants.  The cat tracks in dirt and grass.  Water leaks from…somewhere.  Drifts of white cat hair clump in corners. 

I went to Kobe last weekend and, among (too) many other things, bought a little cloth carrying case for two onigiri.  If you don’t know them, onigiri are the triangular rice balls that Japanese people often eat for lunch.   

Looking cute will not save you now.  Being filled with fish, now that'll do it.
There is no way I can justify having a special container for these objects, but it's charming and purple, and I put it on my kitchen table to cheer me up.  This morning, eating my Mild Chocolate cornflakes, I picked it up to bask in the pointless ownership and a lizard jumped out, onto my face.  We are talking about a harmless, 1.5 inch gecko here, but still, there was much gender-neutral squealing.  Somehow, this incident feels representative of my life here.  So forgive my unfocused post and tune in next week for tales from the Japanese educational system, provisionally titled How I learned to stop worrying and love bombing, or, The Sound of Silence.  Please leave any questions or suggestions in the comments.  Please talk to me.  Someone has to.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

In Which is Explicated my Blog's Poncy Name


If I Cut Through These Woods

If I cut through these woods
The path will lead me back to that water wheel
The birds are crying dazzlingly
They may be a flock of migrating thrushes
With the southern edge of the Milky Way exploding
Radiant white throughout the night
With the fireflies streaming as never before
And, on top of that, the wind ceaselessly rocking the trees
The birds, agitated, unable to sleep
Are naturally making an awful racket
Yet
All I did was take a step into the woods
When the cries became more furious
Sharper, like a sudden downpour
What bizarre funny fellows they are!
This is a large cypress forest
With slivers of sky quivering various ways
Breathing here and there
Between each and every pitch black branch
Messengers, so to speak, of a catalogue of light
 From every possible era that is or ever was
              ...I stand in a daze, aimless
              in the birds' clamour...
The path flows dimly white to the opposite end
And Mars, muddy red, rises
From a hollow in a clump of trees
Two birds somehow slipped in unobserved
Then flew away cheerfully squeaking
Ah, the wind is blowing, carrying warmth and silver molecules
And the touch of every possible tetrahedron
When the fireflies fly in ever greater chaos
The birds' cries become denser
I hear the voice of my dead little sister
Coming from the edge of the woods
              ...even if it isn't so
              there's no need to rethink this
              for there's no difference between any of us...
The sultry fume of grass and the scent  of cypress
The birds' now-deafening racket
What are they clamouring about with such fervour?
The people drawing water to their paddies
May cautiously walk the woods' borders
The stars in the southern sky may stream steadily down
Yet there is no particular danger here
It's all right to sleep your quiet sleep.

-          Kenji Miyazawa

              Better late than never (possibly), I begin my blog chronicling this year in Japan.  Hunting for an appropriate title, and reluctant to compete with the thousand iterations of “My Year in Japan,” I decided to use a line from my favorite Japanese poet, Kenji Miyazawa.    The trouble was that his most blog-title-esque lines were either incredibly pompous (“The Phenomenon Called I”) or came from really depressing poems about death and despair (“Departure on a Different Road,” and don't think I wasn't tempted).  I settled on “A Catalogue of Light” because it's from my favorite poem of Miyazawa's – actually, one of my all-time favorites – and because this blog will inevitably fill with pictures once I get a working internet connection.  I'm a lazy writer.
              I don't feel worthy to tear into the poem itself, considering the small but fiercely educated audience I'm writing for, so I'll just say that I love it and recommend reading more of the poet's work, if you ever have the time.  He regards the natural world through densely interleaved lenses of lyricism and science, peering up through the microscope as well as down, feeling his own place in the ecosystem while he dissects it, creating vivid landscapes that bleed into and out of his own consciousness.  The poems are electric with atomic forces, myosis, beating flagella, and, well, electricity, as well as emotion, and remind me of Blake and Whitman.  Anyone need a publication?
              So, I'm in Japan, because of poetry and language and creeping inadequacy.  I've already had to answer the question, “so, why did you decide to come to Japan?” a few dozen times, and I've fallen back on a pat but incomplete answer: I came because I like studying Japanese, and because I enjoyed teaching in graduate school, so this was a great **opportunity** (what a bullshit word) to combine two of my interests [!!!insert appropriate number of exclamation points, depending on audience!!!].  What I really mean, more or less, is this.  I was so miserable in graduate school, increasingly so after the first two years, and studying Japanese was one of the few things that kept me afloat.  It was challenging, nuanced, satisfied my need to learn, and felt like nothing else in my life.  It also gave structure to my days, which otherwise would have consisted mostly of dreary lab work and, worse, the guilty, terrified avoidance of same. 
              Teaching came at the very end of my higher education, after it had become clear that I would never finish a degree and while I was scrambling to put off reality for just one more year.  I'd always filed teaching away in the “Never Ever Ever” column, between rocket science and professional golf, but I adored it right from the start.  I loved to see the faces, learn the names, know that each name and face held a mind, and try to find some way, any way, to jolt that mind into action.  Maybe that sounds reductive, or dismissive of my students, but it isn't meant to.  It was thrilling.  I had to be confident, be in charge, be interesting.  But I couldn't carry on teaching without more training, which I just couldn't face. 
              So, then the chef gig, which made a welcome change, although I soon became bored.  I snapped more and more often into “zombie state;” maybe you've met it?  Maybe you do it.  Maybe everyone does.  Going weeks, months, in a twilight equidistant from happiness and depression (though there was plenty of that too), feeling myself diminishing, growing plodding and dense.  I can't remember much from the past three years. 
              I'm trying to start again, and so far it really, truly sucks, which is making it difficult to write.  Or at least, to write with any prayer of holding your interest.  EMOOOO!!!  I can feel the bangs crawling into my eyes.  Soon I will break out in gauges, and we can't have that.  So tune in next week for lots of amusing pictures of cats, funny Engrish, and a free guided tour of The Hell of Wood Paneling!  I love and miss you all.  Yes you, even if we haven't seen each other in years.  Please comment if you don't believe me; I'd be glad to list your awesome qualities at length.  Ja, mata ne! (translation: Later, gators.  Gatren?  Gatorii.  It doesn't matter.  Nothing rhymes.)